Wednesday, February 11, 2009

The Yawn Factor

Isn't it awkward when the friend, who is oh so generous, gives you a 'you-have-to-read-this' book? Undoubtably it will be a novel of somewhat questionable writing and most likely filled with a wandering plot that makes you question the publishing industry and characters drawn so thin so can see through them and their families three generations back. Alas, you feign a smile and politely say, 'Oh...thank you' and before you know it you've laid the brickwork for a series of long nights, struggling to finish a few pages before delving into the book you picked out, the one you enjoy, the one taunting you on the bed-side table.

I have recently received such a novel. This time from a friend who usually recommends great books. He introduced me to A House For Mr Biswas, which is now a favourite of mine, so I had every intention of reading the dull, water-warped pages of this 'have-to-read- book', which shall remain nameless for the time being. He had scanned his shelf before our meeting in the city, and thought 'Yes, I bought that years ago when I was in Ireland. It is one of my favourite books. I just forget what it is about' then later told me this as he passed it to me.

I wasn't going to let the one Euro sticker on the cover deter me. Some people just don't have taste. However, the first page was traumatic. Adjective and adverb city! And not just the good old JK Rowling romp through adjective town either. To top it off, it was written in that ever so annoying Old English style (yes, I wrote that on purpose) that leads you to think for the first thirty pages it is set in the 1800s until the protagonist mentions Nixon. Why do authors do this? People from the 1800s aren't reading your book, we are...hopefully.

Tonight marks the fourteenth night of those horrible words and the plot is wandering on one foot, drunk on too much of its own ale, blinded by the umpteenth adjective, searching for a place to lay down and die. I highly suspect this will take place soon, if not, I'll have to shoot it.

Of course there are exceptions to the 'you-have-to-read-this' book lend, but they are exceptions.


bandita said...

Vermy I just used the last 5 mins and 49 secs of my hotel internet credit to read your blog and am so pleased I did! Unfortunately however, I cannot comment anymore as I now have only 1 minute and 15 secs to post this comment, and given this is the very first comment I have ever posted on a blog I suspect it could involve a degree of complexity beyond my capabilities

Amy Jackson said...

Oh Bandita,I extend a warm thank you for so generously using your hotel minutes on me.

lisa said...

Our Chihuahua's are indeed twins! Let's do a playdate!

My girl

Amy Jackson said...


Twinsies indeed! Is your girl shedding like a devil with alopecia at the moment? A playdate sounds great. Oh how motherly of us. We'll bribe them with treats to get along.

lisa said...

At the moment? Always!

Playdate, yes. I find that taking Kim for a big walk pre-occasion works because it tires her out, mwahahahaha. Treats are also good.